Treat others as you want to be treated.

Simple right? Sort of…I mean it’s super simple when your friends and acquaintances are getting along.

I’m a grown woman with 3 small children and in the last 10 years I have seen and heard more drama than all my middle school, high school and college years combined. Granted most would say I was sheltered growing up because I went to a Christian school and hung out with the same group of kids most of my life but when did our society start thriving off of drama?

My husband and I work really hard to keep ourselves and our children grounded in the word so that when situations arise we can have our armor of God ready and on! The other critical piece that we focus on is choosing the right type of friends and spheres of influence we hang out in. Seriously, have you done a pulse check on your friends and the crowd you hang out with?

{Take a moment, pause here and reflect on your friendships. Are they solid? Is there a lot of unnecessary drama? Do you all encourage each other in your walk with the Lord?}

The Bible encourages us repeatedly and gives sound guidance on the types of relationships and specifically friendships we should aspire to have. Friendships are complicated but when you are rooted in the word let me tell you sister, those adversity and ebbs and flows of those relationships will be part of your growth in your faith and the friendship.

One of the greatest gifts in my life has been the incredible Godly friendships I have gained with women like @soul.sistersblog, @cassidyrowell, and @alexandraa.stewart. These 4 women not only look to the Lord for their strength but also encourage, pray for, and build me up in various ways. When we look for friendships we should ask ourselves: does this individual build me up emotionally, physically, and spiritually? If the answer is no than maybe we need to reevaluate that relationship.

God created us to be together. To encourage, to strengthen and to love one another. So why does it seem like friendships are so complicated?

Answer: Because the devil wants to create separation and will use the smallest of disagreements, the smallest of issues, the smallest of disappointments and create an upheaval of unrest.

Solution: Find true Christian friends for life!

I remember a Bible class I had growing up that our teacher told us that true friends do the following:

1. Accept you unconditionally -

Proverbs 17:17 ESV A friend loves at all times and a brother is born for adversity.

2. Love you like Jesus -

John 15:13 ESV Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.

3. Trust you wholeheartedly -

Proverbs 18:24 ESV A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.

4. Have healthy boundaries with you -

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

5. Build you up!

1Thessalonians 5:11 ESV Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.

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I love that! Simple, to the point and Biblically based! We can do that! Right?! Yes, we can!

Where it becomes difficult is when we have to remove the wrong types of relationships from our lives. It’s not an easy task, no one wants to have to do it but as my grandmother always said, ‘you are known by the company you keep.’ I find myself saying this to my children now and find myself struggling some days with this because I want to include everyone. I want everyone to feel loved and accepted.

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with being inclusive! I encourage you to be but what I want you to focus on from everything you’ve read is that those closest to you should be the right type of friendships. They should be edifying to the Lord and they should build you and others up not tear down.

Do a pulse check today and drop us a comment or question below so we can pray with and for you!